Feelings can still haunt you!
‘Yes, it is still hurting… the pain still feels fresh, I still skip a heartbeat every time I see their text or picture’. Happens to you too?
You want to fix it? Let’s do this!
First of all, you want to know why you feel this way? Because you didn’t let the pain hurt you to the fullest, and you didn’t let what happened to you sink into you to the fullest. Meaning: when we are going through certain pain, most of us find shortcuts to kill the pain by either making new friends who excite more than the pain that hurts or by partying more often to put the reality of our phase under the carpet.
And after a certain period of time, your lifestyle changed but you assumed that you passed through the pain while the reality was that the emotion was still there left behind for you to feel it to the fullest and soak in it till you realise the message that emotion had to convey.
I know this might sound uncomfortable but the truth is, this is the truth.
So what needs to be done?
Go back, and allow those hurtful emotions to soak in completely… you might think this is crazy or hard to understand, I get it but I urge you to use your mind during this time to be your best friend.
Example: I revisit my pain, while it feels horrible, I start saying to my mind ‘I accept whatever I feel right now, yes I surrender to this feeling, Yes I miss this person, but I am here to set him/her free to move forward in my life’ constantly repeat this… I name it ‘Reverse law method’.
When you resist and restrict what you feel, it gets hard and it gets deeper, instead, reverse the feeling by surrendering and say ‘you are here to acknowledge and accept’ as you do this, the hard feeling doesn’t have any power towards you to control your feelings.
It is the same with people, when someone constantly blames you, at one point you agree to disagree… when you respond to them by saying ‘yes, you are right, I was wrong, it was my fault’ they will lose their power to attack you any longer.
Trust me, try this and you will thank me later!
Go there, feel it to the fullest. Either of two things will happen, either you will reintroduce to the same pain ( release it as I explained above), or you will learn that there are no more emotions left to feel that pain anymore.
And for the people who have dealt with the pain to the fullest already: Oftentimes we misunderstand that we are still hurt because of so-and-so reasons, but maybe that bad memory already lost its essence or power in our lives. Most of those emotions are still too heavy just in our mind, as our will to feel it that heavy for what has happened… maybe, in reality, the pain is fading and has no more energy to pull you down. This is something you need to check by asking this question to yourself!
After setting yourself free, you will finally see that you are surrounded by a beautiful garden full of flowers, and now, going forward keep nourishing it.
To simplify: There are two ways to deal with pain: 1.) By taking shortcuts and finding fancy ways to avoid feeling the pain, this is a temporary escape. 2.) By facing the pain to the fullest, you learn a lot of things hard way and once you get through this tuff phase all by yourself, you will never look back! This might be uncomfortable but helps you heal forever.
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P.S: I am super excited to share my first book ‘BREEZE BROUGHT YOU BACK‘!!!
Get your copy from AMAZON or from GOLDRIBBON (avail 10% discount).
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GMAIL: wowbymady09@mady
Happy Feelings!