Below 6 pointers I shared will let you think deep as you read while you still stay connected with me! Let me take you into the experience of viewing everything from my standpoint!
1.) social detox:
I gave myself a 55days break from Instagram and Facebook in order to distance myself from an image that I was chasing hard while I let everyone on social media influence me… While the reality was that I have an image of my own and I live in it with pride, yet felt that I’m falling behind in life. When I realised that Life is absolutely fine, I wanted to stay in reality where I get to scroll my own thoughts and get to see the images that are on my mind on my feed and not others profile or content. I have dreams and goal to achieve but I wasn’t motivated enough to take that first step. So I took a step back to stay in my own ground for a while. I took a deep breath and deactivated my social profiles and deleted the app (because I know somewhere unknowingly I have let the influencers I follow influence me a little too much where I ended up focusing on nothing). I kicked off the world that wasn’t even mine and instantly felt such a relief and light-weighted.
So here is what happens when you step out of social media:
Once you go on a social detox, life doesn’t seem interesting for a while and that might change your mind to go back and active your social media profiles.
Remember that it’s when you feel the need to go back to social media is exactly when your ‘life is actived’. You tend to choose a place that is familiar and influential because it’s easy to stick around the environment you are comfortable with rather than interesting yourself to make your own life a place that you would choose to live at.
I highly recommend you stick to your decision to be out of social media for a while and catch up with your life… make your life work for your own good. that’s when you’ll find out how manipulate social media is to make you believe you aren’t enough or your life isn’t perfect.
2.) Life and Death: (what you going to read below is simple yet deep. I want you to keep your mind free and absorb what you read. It’s worth your time)
Here is what I learned and realised.
A.) The fear that we hold on to is only in our mind and not in reality. You might say that the fear of failing in an exam is real. Fear of failing in marriage is real. Fear of death is real. The fear as you define is real only as an emotion and not as the end of the world. If I ask you what’s your fear, you will describe the emotion you attach to certain things and failing in it is what causes the fear. but the same reason for others is not a fear but a possibility of an unexpected outcome.
So the fear that you holding on to is only in mind and not reality. Reality is death. Death is not a fear or an emotion… it is an inevitable happening in life.
So I want you to live exceeding your limits and go to the dead end of how far you can go… and if death comes, you are ready without any regrets. Don’t give a damn what others think while you are alive, because they are not thinking/judging about those who are no more.
So stop wasting time hesitating to do what you want to.
B.) Karma is real. What goes around, comes around… either in the same life or some other life. Everything in the Universe is all about balance.
C.) I met people who are rude and critic of others and towards themselves… I realised that one must always be kind and a peacemaker because death is the rudest reality that can ever happen to anyone. when it comes, it takes you away from everything you lived for and everything would die for. So the least we can do is to care for each other.
Think about it.
D.) People spend their first hour of the day being grateful to god and dedicate all their heart and mind in remembering him… and live rest of the day in toxic ways. Trusting and loving GOD doesn’t do any good if your heart isn’t pure for others too.
E.) Life is so short in this generation. because of the lifestyle, food habits, running to earn money, or the stress level. You don’t get to live till your 80s to experience/ experiment with life. Sometimes 20s is all the time you’ll have. So don’t live like you are here forever. don’t stay stuck in one place because it takes you nowhere.
No one is stopping you. Absolutely no one. You are the original and you hold all the copyrights to live your life with your own rules. Don’t let any emotion keep you away from the life that’s ahead.
F.) Those people who are negative about everything in life and often says “I’m unlucky”, “I wish I die”, “No good happens to me” is a victim mentality, and I can say that these people write their own destiny through their words.
During my meditation, it does open my mind to learn the truth about life… and one more truth that I discovered and immediately started being mindful is that ”your thinking is manifesting too”. So be mindful what you repeatedly think about… be assured that it’s coming your way.
G.) never be a reason someone holds on to fear of trusting life or people.
Some people do complicate others life, even those people’s life who wants to help them, because they live every minute in such complex situations they create for themselves. (Remember quote: ‘a messed up person will mess you up’ True.)
H.) Just so you know I know: (people and society)
THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE TRYING TO WIN WITH
WHAT IS NOT RIGHT.
WHAT IS NOT TO BE SAID.
AND WHAT ISN’T TRUE.
So do not fight too hard trying to understand why people are so difficult. Instead accept that every human has another side which doesn’t feel convinced that it could be the same person doing something so different. Collection of such human behaviour and mindset is what forms society.
3.) Visited Bali again for two days! To START.
If you follow me on Insta, you know that I went to Bali for a vacation last 2months back. I visited Bali with an intention to start a business and start looking for what I wanted to do. It took a lot of time and multiple rides to the same place to make sure the quality I was looking for. also visited different states in India for the same. I placed order for some of the products and revisited Bali recently to receive the stock. Taking a chance to experiment new things because now I’m in a place where I don’t give a damn about what others think of me. I have bills to pay, things to take care of, and I have a vision board that can become my reality anytime soon so I need to be ready to embrace that gift from the Universe.. and for which I need to push myself to make good things happen to me. Now I don’t question twice about what I am suppose to do (that only wasted my time and energy overthinking the ideas but never taking that first step). Instead just start doing something and push yourself to do it anyway even if no one approves of it. I realised that everyone is looking for everything that people got to offer. If you have an idea, and you know you got something that can minimise or address the pain point of an individual, just go for it. Don’t overthink. Don’t try too hard to figure out the strategy on YouTube or on google… because the only strategy is to START. Everything ahead will be taken care of when you take that first step. Life is all about experimenting with all the ideas that you got till you feel settled with one thing that gives you reason to celebrate life.
For those of you who are thriving hard to reach your goal, Let me tell you this:
Not every skill that’s displayed with huge success rate (as they claim) on social media is for you. I repeat, not every skill that’s displayed on social media is for you. Just focus on that one skill you know you are good at, and repeatedly watch and read success stories on the same skill till you get there. Remember you are in a market place called social media where people are selling their business to people who are looking to buy what they got to offer… and not to distract you.
Stay committed and consistent with what you doing.
4.) Pressure to deliver purpose !
The pressure that you feel today to do something in life is like travelling in a bumpy road to reach your destination. It makes you uncomfortable. You might wonder if you need this or continue to travel in this path but also don’t feel like giving up. The pressure that you feel is the only key master that will lead you where you suppose to be. I suggest you keep going even if you aren’t comfortable because I have been there and I know that though it sometimes makes you feel lost, your purpose and passion towards doing something in life will always find you and take you where you belong.
5.) God is real in unrealistic ways (when it gets too hard to understand God’s plan)
I cannot explain how powerful it is when you seek God’s guidance.
During a phase in my life, I asked God to show me a clear sign to come to a conclusion because I was extremely confused about what to do in the situation. This might sound unreal but with 48hours, God moved everything about the situation too fast by bringing the truth and reality right in front of me which was so blunt and evident that it shook me up. Frankly I wasn’t ready for what it was, I wasn’t ready for such a major sign.
Literally after my prayer, years of being stagnant in a situation have bottled down to a crystal clear moment where there was no more ifs and buts.
It’s not that I didn’t pray for the same before, it’s about coming to the dead end of your energy with it and finally seeking God’s help because you know there is nothing left.
God can get too real in ruthless ways when you looking for an answer or a clarity… be ready to see and accept it even if it doesn’t look rosy or convincing.
I strongly believe that meditation got me close to God and understand God’s language. I mean, everyone every time is close to God but understanding him is only possible in silence… only in meditative silent. Don’t be confused with what your mind is thinking and what the energy (God) is saying. It requires a deep focus and understanding. Keep trying to pay attention in silence after your prayer. Silence is a loud voice of the energy if you can accept the other side of the world. (Beyond science is always a controversial subject and let’s not get too deep into it.)
6.) Fearing attachments?
One of my friend was going through a long term relationship break up and I coached him to make way out of the depression because he was absolutely becoming miserable as he was not able to help himself. During the process of healing, though he was getting better emotionally, he constantly kept saying that going forward he is scared of attachments and I know I need to take care of this belief so that he can give love another chance.
What you going to read below is how I did my bit to help him heal.
Trust me I am scared of attachments too. But I realised that attachment does make me feel loved and it makes my heart work the right way- loving others and giving it all unconditionally without having expectations. So what an attachment does to you is a right thing.
Let me tell you something: Don’t ever fear attachment. There is no way you can live and love without it. Instead of cutting that off, learn to be practical and learn how to deal with yourself when you start feeling detached.
I only felt detached once in my life, so far. I made sure I will never place myself in a place where I have to struggle so much again so I paid attention on how I am pulling myself out. I learned how to handle this in two steps (hard way). I will explain exactly how to deal with it as mentioned below:
A.) Set yourself a timeline:
I started cutting cords with anything that was associated with this person (Btw, attachment can be with a person, pet, place… anything). I deleted all the pictures but not from the recently deleted album. I deleted the message conversations and not from the recently deleted folder. basically I started working with my mind that this person doesn’t exist in my priority and active list (Your mind notices and registers it, trust me). And why not deleted from recently deleted folders? It is to, at the same time, pamper my mind and heart to console it by saying that I can call back these memories ‘if I wanted to’ meanwhile give myself a timeline of 30days because the folder automatically deletes the data stored in recycle bin. I started questioning myself constantly if I really need to restore when I decided to end things with this person… because it’s like I’m hugging the toxic emotion up close.
Getting close to 30days, if I still feel attached to the messages and pictures, I restore and delete again giving myself another 30days to learn detachment. I practice the same thing again till I’m finally ready to let go even those memories (Remember the goal is to come out clean from this whole chapter (relationship) so that you are not holding back or holding onto anything against this person, that makes it easy for you to heal. Post 4-5months practising this, I started managing myself without the whole existence of this person. one night, I remember for the first time in a long time I was laughing watching a Netflix show without remembering this person for few hours straight… I gathered myself together and finally deleted the recently deleted albums. I hugged myself and said to myself “I’m proud of you! We don’t need that anymore. You are free. Just go LIVE, life is calling!” and sighed with relief because it immediately felt like a closure I was seeking!
B.) Going against your own mind:
Your mind will have a pattern from childhood to go back to what is familiar though it is healthy or unhealthy to you. You get to take charge on how to navigate your mind as you grow. Till it gets used to the change, You need to go against it if required.
It is normal that you will feel like this feeling is impossible to come out of. You are going to question a lot of things. You going to miss, cry and feel like dying for this person (at extreme)… IT IS NORMAL to feel this way. This is how it feels before you heal. Do not fight your emotions and mess yourself up. Surrender to your emotions. Remember to surrender to emotions in a bounce back tone. (Example: If you feel void and miss this person, sit and let ‘sad’ emotions flow by and surrender it by saying this way: yes I miss this person crazily today but I’m going to be fine (you are also telling your mind that you are going to be fine in sometime in a bounce back tone). In the same way, if you feel hate to this person, surrender to this emotion by saying “I just hate this person at this moment realising how much of my peace is lost and I don’t deserve this for being loyal and loving. But I know what the person did is his freedom but I will never stop being loving and loyal just because someone didn’t appreciate”.)
Master practising these two things. It isn’t easy but it works. It worked for my friend heal better.
“Keep giving yourself timelines and accept that it is going to take time to turn someone so familiar to your mind into unfamiliar. but how you heal and detach is very important for your mental health. Remember only when it gets hard is when you use the power of your love to heal yourself.”
This process didn’t only healed me but also taugh me my worth… It absolutely made me an alpha female. I take a lot of pride in myself.
SO as I conclude this topic here, let me remind you again: “Don’t ever fear attachment. There is no way you can live and love without it. Instead of cutting that off, learn to be practical and learn how to deal with yourself when you start feeling detached.”
We got to the end of the post and I hope you found this worth your time. Do let me know your thoughts by commenting or messaging me… It helps me stay motivated to write more of such posts for you!
Do check my blog posts here: https://mady.blog/category/my-perception-and-poems/